Tag: Parenting


“If I Can Turn Back Time, What Would I Do Differently?”

21
May
My Family

My Family

Is it the hormones again? Or maybe I’m really getting old (I hope not so fast though) … because old pictures are making me cry …

Of all the many realizations I’ve had, the most striking is this: that time flies so fast!

If only ….

Sarah, Ella, Tonton, and April

Sarah, Ella, Tonton, and April

Someone has written that these two are the saddest words a person can utter. In a way, yes, there’s truth to it. But I prefer to look at it differently. I’m going to write about my “if only’s” so that my children will know how much I love them; so that they will know that if I missed doing things with them when they were younger – that it was not intentional. I also want them to learn from my short comings (I believe they are not really mistakes because I never knew then what I was supposed to do); so that when they become mothers themselves (and Father for Romelson), they can look back and say … “Momi taught me that …”

So here goes my: “If I can turn back time, what would I do differently?”

I’d breastfeed all of them all the way …

I will be a full-time stay-home-Mom …

I’ll teach them to sing and dance …

Dadi, Myco, and Ella playing "balay balay" ...

 

I’ll ask their Dad to make/construct them a small bamboo “balay balay” … Kanang dunay sala and bedroom and tiny kitchen hahaha! I know their Dad will say yes! (on second thought, pwede pa man ko mag ask karon hahaha!)

Then we’ll play house together …

I’ll talk to them about my childhood …

I’ll let them spend long vacations in my childhood home with their Lolo and Lola …

I’ll say yes every time they ask if “pwede maligo sa ulan”(unless dunay thunderstorms and lightning hahaha!)…

I’ll hug them more and kiss them more, bisan teenagers na sila …

I’ll tell them that they can talk to me about anything …

I’ll read the scriptures with them regularly …

Anyway … the list can go on and on and on …

April and Ate Ella

April and Ate Ella

I just hope and pray that my children know how much I love them … and how much I want them to be happy … and how much it will mean to me that they do their best in everything.  I hope I have raised them to be good and responsible individuals. I hope when they become parents themselves, they will be the much “better me” …

Ate Mymy and Tonton

Ate Mymy and Tonton

You are my greatest treasures in my life … you are my reason for waking up in the morning and my inspiration in my work … because of you I am trying to become better … ♥♥♥

Guess who?

Guess who?

 

Mymy and Ann Ann

Mymy and Ann Ann

 

Ella, Sarah, and April ♥

Ella, Sarah, and April ♥

 

My eldest and my youngest - Myco and Tonton ♥

My eldest and my youngest - Myco and Tonton ♥

Comment » | Reflections and Perspectives

10 Ways to Teach Values in the Home*

16
November

The home is the best place for children to learn good values. Values guide our behavior and help us make decisions between right and wrong. Our sense of values determines the way we spend our time and money. Priorities in life are based on what we value.

Parents teach children their values by what they say and how they act. Therefore, parents should agree on what values are important. Certain values, such as honesty, courtesy, and service, should be part of every family’s values. Children who learn and follow moral values are more likely to make wise decisions when they are older. Teach your children that decisions they make while they are young affect the rest of their lives.

Parents who do not teach their children correct values deprive them of solid basis for approaching life. Gordon B. Hinckley said, “The home is the seed bed of all true virtue. If proper values are not taught in the home, they are not likely to be taught at all.”

 

The following ten suggestions can help us teach our children proper values in our own homes:

  1. Give Our Children Responsibilities in the Home
  1. Help Our Children Set Goals
  1. Teach by Example
  1. Study Our Family History
  1. Serve with Our Family
  1. Establish Family Traditions
  1. Monitor the Media
  1. Look for Teaching Opportunities
  1. Decide Which Values Are Nonnegotiable
  1. Allow Children to Participate in Family Decisions

The power to choose is one of the greatest gifts God has given humanity. Children who are allowed to share in family decisions will be more willing to obey family rules.

Allow children to make decisions that are appropriate for their ages and responsibility levels. This provides them freedom but does not sacrifice family values.

Explain to children the reasons for having family rules and the values attached to those.

The following can be done as a family:

  • Set a curfew.
  • Establish rules about inviting friends to the house.
  • Plan activities and vacations.
  • Divide and assign household chores.

* From a Pamphlet of the same title by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints

Comment » | Parenting

How Do I Love Thee … Mother?

8
October

I was 2 plane-rides away from home, and it was fast and testimony Sunday. I was in Bacolod for a series of firesides and I sincerely began feeling melancholic thinking about my family back home. Good thing that Church is practically the same everywhere, and with that knowledge came peace in my heart. I know that we will all be attending our Sunday services, listening to the same lessons, feeling the same sweet spirit.

And so my friend Met and I went inside the Sacrament Hall. She asked me where I prefer to sit. I told her way back home, my family and I, we have a special place, a spot we have chosen ever since we became members of the church 18 years ago. I motioned her towards the front of the hall on the right side, and we sat on the second row, exactly the same spot I will be had I been in my home ward – beside my sweetheart, together with my children.

Waiting for the meeting to start, we looked around, trying to see if we knew anybody. Church is actually one great big family, and it is normal for one to see someone familiar. In our case, we have met the previous day a good friend from CES who used to serve in Cagayan de Oro – President Ric Cobing. Just in time, the whole Cobing family came in: President Cobing, his wife Lolit, and their beautiful children. How the children have grown!

Then came the Nang family. I recognized Aying. She’s still as beautiful as ever! I looked at her children. I counted: six! Six beautiful children. Aying and I visited for a while, in hushed tones. She made a comment about my incredibly and ridiculously short pixie hair, and we laughed a little.

Then the meeting started.

Came the time for members to bear their testimonies. Met whispered to me that we should bear our testimonies, so that our sins will be forgiven. I smiled at her and I said I probably would need all the will power I have just to stand.

Slowly, one after the other, members stood and shared their testimonies.

Then, much to my surprise, one tiny person walked bravely towards the pulpit. He was Aying’s son. I said to myself he must be around 5 or 6 years old. We could barely see him! I guess all of us smiled as he fumbled to hold the microphone.

He began by telling all of us that his Mom tells them a very special story – his Mom’s favorite story – during bedtime. He began by narrating to us what the story was all about – of a Mother and her son and a rainbow. In the story, the mother told her son that should she die, she will turn herself into a rainbow so she can watch over him. Then, Aying’s son said: “So I pray everyday that my Mom will not die. I don’t want her to die, because I won’t be able to do anything without her. I love her so much and I want to be with her always. “

We all cried. I saw Aying’s husband wipe his eyes. I could not help but look around. Mothers in the congregation were all teary-eyed. I was busy rummaging my bag for a tissue. Metmet too, who was sitting on my left, was also crying. The young woman on my right was crying too! And even now, as I recall what he said in that meeting, I still could not fight off the tears.

Aying’s son gave me an unforgettable gift that beautiful and spiritual Fast and Testimony Sunday – innocence, pure and sincere love – expressed!

After the meeting, I went to the boy who was sitting closely to his Mom. I asked Aying for permission and then gave the boy a hug.

I wanted to comfort him, to tell him not to worry so much. I wanted to give him the reassurance that his Mom will be with him for a long long time …

So i hugged him tight, and gave him a kiss. Maybe in his young mind he was puzzled by my action, for he never even knew me. He looked at his Mom, and then he gave me a smile. His eyes was still sad. And as we all walked out the hall, I looked for him one last time…

There he was – still holding on to his Mom’s hand.

A child’s love – pure, sincere, true..

Aying and her son Kenshii

 

Comment » | Parenting

Back to top